Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Randomize
