Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
