I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
