I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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