She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Everyone says I win the strip club
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
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