Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
