so explain again why im purple
no
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
