What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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