yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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