I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
