Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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