If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
That's how pantless uber rides happen
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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