Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
