I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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