ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Randomize
