I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
