real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
