Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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