I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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