drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
