she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
