good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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