i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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