Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
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