Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
