We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
