Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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