Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize