She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
