Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
It's like God shit irony all over that family
drinking out of a sandbucket again
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
