I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
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