11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
