come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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