I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Someone came in the potted fern
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
