Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
