In the future we'll all be gay
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
