It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
