3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
...so i touched it.
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize