Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
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