Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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