dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
