How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
