My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
Randomize