Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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