dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Randomize
