You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
