Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
