I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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