Is it normal to miss your booty call?
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
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