Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize