At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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