OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Randomize
